![]() |
All about Grief & Loss |
|
|
Suicide in the Church Part 1
Recently, several suicides have occurred right here in my own hometown of about 16,000 people. The latest of these involved a friend of mine who was, among other things, the leader of a Christian Business Fellowship which I attend. He was a lawyer with a terrific wife, two young kids, very prominent in his church, coached little league baseball. As one can imagine, speculations abound - everything from possible chemical imbalances to unfair, unfounded comments which...well, small town gossip can be so mean-spirited. These local suicides also have Christians from various camps wondering and discussing what happens after a Christian commits suicide. Some eMails I've received on this subject have included words like "unsettling", "confused" and "disturbing." Since we are the Body of Christ, "a body fitly joined," as Scripture declares, when something happens here, it's happening there. If it hasn't hit your community square in the face just yet, chances are it will. I'm reminded of the theme song from the TV series "M.A.S.H." It was called "Suicide is painless." No, it's not. It hurts a lot. It's hurting me. Personally, I was raised believing that a Christian who killed themselves received a quick ticket to hell. The concept being that, since murderers would burn in hell, what was suicide but self-murder with absolutely no time for repentance? Apparently, "Thou shalt not kill" referred even to the killing of oneself. This concept now strikes me as quite silly, for all sins...murder, suicide, gossip, slander, rage, infidelity...are all forgivable by the sacrifice of Christ on the cross. By and large, that's pretty standard Christian fare, right? To say otherwise is to imply that the crucifixion had no effect on some particular sins. As my own relationship with God has developed, I am now convinced that, as the Apostle Paul wrote to the Christians in Rome, "Nothing can separate us from the love of God." The Greek word for 'nothing' can best be defined as ...well, NOTHING! I found a half dozen cases of suicide in the Bible and the Good Book does not appear to condemn the act. The most notorious accounts were those of King Saul (1 Sam. 31:2-5) and Judas Iscariot (Matt. 27:3-5). Others are Abimelech (Judges 9:50-54), who ordered his armor-bearer to kill him, Samson (Judges 16:23-31), Ahithophel (2 Sam. 17:23), and Zimri (1 Kings 16:15-20). Even Elijah despaired of his own life (1 Kings 18:40; 19:4) and Job's wife told him he'd be better off killing himself (Job 2:7-9). Far as I can tell, none of these people who went through with it were explicitly condemned for taking his own life. Most people who take their own lives are not usually cool and rational about it. I doubt many set out to flout the will of God. I've read that 500,000 Americans attempt suicide annually! I must believe that they are not so much choosing death as they are stumbling down into it from a steep slope of despair. Every 17 minutes someone in America commits suicide. This is the third-leading cause of death among people 15 to 25 years old, college students for the greater part. Even more tragically, among children between 5 and 14 years of age, suicide is the sixth most common cause of death. Something's VERY wrong. People are hurting everywhere. we know this because, after all, hurting people are hurting people everywhere we turn. People need help. Maybe someone you know of, someone who puts up a pretty good front at work or even at Church, or even in your home, needs something more than a handshake or a pat on the back. Love, after all, is spelled T-I-M-E. So, give someone your attention today. Ask "How are you?" and pause, look them in the eye and await their response. Say their names in conversation and drop them an encouraging eMail. Every one of us is a potential lifesaver. As life guards are taught to handle drowning victims, let them kick and scream and thrash about, but let's all try and be there when they decide they just can't swim another stroke. Please write team1min@aol.com and request Suicide parts 2 & 3 FORWARD the messages! Pastor Michael has been broadcasting messages of Discipleship & Encouragement to the Body of Christ by email since 1999. Since then these messages have been published on numerous other sites, reprinted in paper newsletters belonging to other ministries, have been used as a source of teaching and preaching by ministers and Bible teachers worldwide, and have ministered to the Body of Christ of nearly every major denomination.
MORE RESOURCES:
Grief-Loss - Google News |
RELATED ARTICLES
Silent Tears - from a Norwegian Hospital Silent tears hit hospital-white sheets. The young Pakistani mother holds the mask that brings moisture, oxygen and medicine to her babygirls lungs as she struggles against the slime that threatens to suffocate her. Whens Sarah Coming Home? Helping Your Child Understand Death For most children, their first experience with grief comes with the death of a beloved family pet. When Zoe the eight-week old puppy dies of parvovirus or Tweety the budgie stops singing his morning song, a child experiences profound and lasting loss for the first time in their young lives. Dying On the Inside: A Childs Grief The impatient tooting of a car horn startled us into awareness. No one had thought beyond making it through the grievous night. The Creative Side of Healing One of the areas where I seem to be placing most of my focus these days is the relationship between creative expression and healing. Something that I have always found to be particularly fascinating is the fact that the words heal, whole and holy all come from the same Latin root. The Truth About Emotional Intelligence There is so much emphasis on emotional intelligence these days that it appears that people are suppressing their emotions and problems in an effort to "fit in," to keep their jobs, and using "positive self-talk" to muscle through the rough spots in their lives.Recently, I had a friend over who has suffered enormous job stress during a time when his wife's father was dying of cancer. You Have to Show Up: On Small Miracles (Okay, maybe not so small) I hadn't intended to go to my cousin's funeral.That sounds terrible, I know. Are We All Losers? Understanding Grief The well-known pioneer researcher Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross identified five states through which the dying patient goes. Why Does God Allow Suffering? Justin was a typical ten year old boy. He liked Leggos, trains, and watching TV. Death, Close and Personal I got an email recently from someone whose mother died. She knew I'd suffered the loss of my mother and wanted some insight on how to deal with it. After Suicide: Returning to Life, Thanks to an Owl Have you ever lost the ability to laugh? I did.When Arlyn died, I knew I would never laugh again. Suicide - An Eternal Pain Suicide is the one form of death that has quite a stigma attached to it. It brings with it a feeling of shame and betrayal. Trial by Fire - 9 Tips for Grieving Couples You will often hear that grief and loss bring couples together, but it can actually do just the opposite. It is possible to emerge on the other side of grief with a closer marriage, but it does take work. Suicide in the Church Part 2 In a town the size of mine - about 16,000 - can a few suicides within a 90-day period be considered an epidemic? I'd say so. Quite a few Christians have contacted me since these tragedies have occurred, people struggling with the in's and out's of suicide and its effect on one's eternal reward, among other concerns. Miracles? If we were to organize a list of the thorniest problems for the bereaved, certainly somewhere near the top would be the question of miracles. Everybody has heard anecdotal stories of certain people who have suffered incredible, life-threatening injuries or illness, but who have somehow recovered against all odds. Signs After Suicide: The Red Butterfly Shortly after noon, I went into Arlyn's bedroom to get a few things to take with me. I was preparing to drive about three miles out into the country, to Woodhaven Road. Then and Now Over one hundred years ago, during the Victorian era, death and grief were popular subjects for poems, songs and stories. Grieving was considered a natural and acceptable part of the culture. Grief & Loss - Healing Your Broken Heart What is it about Grief & Loss that upsets us so much? Is it the heavy duty emoting that we have to do to get through our suffering? Is it the fear we have about opening ourselves to all this pain? Because, let's face it, it's hard down there, in the land of grieving where all those emotions toss us around like a cork on a stormy sea.We understand that this is necessary, at a surface level, but how we are feeling is what really counts. What this Rabbi Learned from Not being Re-hired It's a familiar story, and I have been through it before, and so have you. In January the Synagogue Personnel Committee told me that they were recommending that the synagogue not renew my contract. Grief Support: The Dos Helpers often ask questions such as: "What should I do? What should I say? Am I doing the right thing? Did I do the wrong thing?" Here are some suggestions for how to best help those in grief.1) Do give grievers the permission to grieve. Scared to Death of Dying and Denying Grief When I invited Martha to the gathering at my house, she accepted the invitation cheerfully. Martha was new to the area and so I thought this small potluck I was hosting would be a chance for her to get to know other women in our town. |
| home | site map |
| tons-of-articles © 2006 |